The Adobe Borg

I just have to get this out of my system. The Adobe Creative Cloud scam - yes scam. This is not about helping all of us long time customers out. Not about giving us more value for our dollar, it's not even about some "new" technology. This is all about more revenue and more control for Adobe from it's existing mostly long time customer base. If somehow you think it's some gee-whiz new tech because of the whole "cloud" thing in the name get real. This is a throwback to the way IBM leased software way way back in the Mainframe days dressed up with some new hip cloud-y words.

Let's see - exactly what is this cloudy thing… Does somehow Adobe run the software up in the cloud thereby allowing you to run the software on any old computer of cheap cost - harnessing some cloud datacenter? Of course not. It is software that is downloaded and runs on your resources just like before - just as if you bought it and ran it. Does it somehow technologically allow Adobe to magically deliver updates and fixes so so so much faster than before because of "the cloud". Don't be daft - same software engineering process, same QC - or let's hope so - same same same. It downloads updates via the internet… how cloud-y and innovative. Yea it's completely different. All those new features available in June for "cloud-y" customers - they cannot possibly be downloaded by the regular internet update mechanism for people that paid for the product that have ALWAYS paid and paid and paid. Only for those willing to sign up for the cloud. You see that update process is complete different - it's technologically impossible to deliver them without the cloud. Completely ridiculous. It's artificial. It's a scam - at first to lure those that absolutely believe they need anti-blurry-ness bullshit to pay monthly. Count on this "stick made out of carrots" to hit harder and harder for those that want to stick to the conventional model with YOU in the drivers seat.

Here is how this will go…

  • Attractive price that somewhat might compare to the historical "upgrade" price if you happen to upgrade to EVERY version.
  • A few bones thrown in that if you are on "the cloud" you get updates - fuck you if you paid up front.
  • Some lip service about continued commitment to offer both pricing/license models while increasing the "you are screwed" factor if you choose the traditional model.
  • Continued ramp up of the screwing of customers that desire the old license model until nobody in their right mind will be able to afford or put up with the continuous screwing up the ass.
  • Some sort of statement that there are only 4 idiots in the world that opt for the old license model hence "no choice" but to discontinue it.
  • Everyone locked in to monthly model. Everyone completely screwed. Every time Adobe wants more revenue the monthly cost will go up - sometimes for NO added value. In fact I will almost guarantee the company will have virtually no incentive to make any attractive new-ness. Maybe they will, maybe they won't pricing will be arbitrary no matter if it adds additional value for customers or not. Hey fuck you - pay it or your shit will not work. Not even your old shit. If you don't pay this month all your shit is turned OFF - fuck you and your files.

Do you think this particular strategy I outlined above was not discussed and planned inside Adobe? Do you think it was part of a meeting of how to give all the wonderful customers more bang for their buck? Of course not - don't be foolish. All of you people not working for Adobe and getting paid by Adobe that are cheerleading this are morons. This is not a technological marvel of cloud computing. This is entirely for the financial benefit of Adobe - that's fine with me, I am a capitalist. The problem comes in where the control of your wallet is removed and uncoupled completely from Adobe's incentive to deliver compelling additional value - key word additional - while extracting a continuous revenue stream from every single customer no matter what. This is very very very bad. Bad for Adobe as investment in technology is decoupled from continued revenue and definitely bad for it's customers. When Customers are not in the drivers seat it is a very very bad thing for everyone one way or another - heck it's even bad for capitalism.


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